Commando For A Night
by Croke
Summary: This takes place during the time of the loincloth-masked man! Hijikata and Okita quarreling as always, but has it ever been quite like this? Please Enjoy! I do not own Gintama or any of the characters. Thank you!


**Commando For a Night**

Hijikata x Okita

Waking up after another day of working in the Shinsengumi, I sat up in my futon, only to realize I couldn't see. Curious as to what happened to my sight, I lifted my hand sluggishly up to my face and felt the soft fabric guarding my vision. Pulling it off my face, I glared at it silently.

"Uwoooh!" I hollered, raging.

"Hijikata-san!" I heard Sougo's excited cry. "You can't die, yet! Only I can- oh."

I glared at him, infuriated, my hand filled with the soft, frilly fabric. His face contorted into a suggestive smirk.

"Hijikata-san, I didn't know you were such a pervert," he chuckled darkly.

"Oi! These aren't mine, bastard! They were there when I woke up!" I shouted at him, throwing the underwear at his face.

Letting them hit, Sougo then proceeded to announce breakfast and a meeting with Kondo-san.

After getting into a better state in my robe, I arrived at the meeting room.

"Toshi, Sougo, it looks as though the loincloth-masked man has reappeared in Edo," Kondo-san started.

"Loincloth-masked?" Sougo asked, innocent.

"He runs around at night in his briefs with a red loincloth hiding his face, stealing pretty women's underwear and giving it to men who are unpopular with the ladies. Sick bastard," Kondo-san explained, serious.

"That explains the underpants on your face this morning, Hijikata-san," Sougo snickered.

"You were offered underpants?!" Kondo-san bursted.

I glowered at the underpants, upset over the truth. I live in a dojo of only men! I am bad with women. But why does everyone have to know?

Then I spotted something.

"Kondo-san," I pointed to something pink falling out of his jacket.

"Uuuoh!" he shouted, pretending he hadn't already noticed.

I face-palmed. At least I wasn't alone?

:

"Why am I here?" I growled inwardly.

The Yorozuya had decided to team up with the Shinsengumi to catch the loincloth-masked man.

"The 35th annual loincloth-masked man capture plan!" is what they're calling this. How pathetic sounding...

That's when the attention was turned to me.

"For revenge, right, Hijikata-san?" they pointed at me.

Some of them gave odd looks, so Sougo went on.

"It's because someone was stupid enough to send Hijikata-san a pair of those pity underpants."

Sougo hung out the particular underpants that had been on my face this morning. Working quickly, I shredded the underpants before my brain could register the color, sheathing my sword angrily.

"He's a dead man!"

:

"Let us dye his white briefs red with blood!"

That's what they said, but he didn't even bleed- just blew up.

Staring at the blown up Yorozuya and loincloth-masked man, Sougo and I were still safe in the scenery.

"Actually, Hijikata-san, I'm the one who sent you that underwear," Sougo said honestly.

"What did you say?!" I raged, ready to kill him.

"It was a joke, a joke," he tried to survive a minute longer.

"I don't care, you bastard! Wait!"

Taking a step forward from the safe zone, though, was not the smartest idea. A series of eruptions surrounded the dojo, blowing us all sky high.

:

Sighing, I walked out of the bath, clean and relaxed after a day of being charred.

"Bastard Sougo," I grumbled, furrowing my eyebrows. "Where'd he even get those from?"

"Hello there, Hijikata-san," Sougo greeted, sitting in my room, sipping tea.

"Uwooh!" I shouted.

"What a warm welcome," he smirked.

"What do you want?" I grumbled, sitting down across from him within a 10 foot pole poking distance.

"Hijikata-san," Sougo started. "Why are you so far away? Look, tea."

Holding up a tea cup for me, Sougo tried to come closer. Feeling that he had poisoned the tea, I backed away from him. Realizing this, Sougo stopped his advances.

"Hijikata-san," Sougo whined. "Come on; are you still angry about that?"

"Huh?" I questioned, remembering the previous events.

"Hijikata-san," he appeared right in front of me. "I'm sorry. See? This is apology tea."

Pushing the cup into my hands, he then proceeded to back away from me about a foot. He stared at me expectantly.

"What?" I growled.

"You're not drinking it," he gave me the puppy eyes.

"Gah," I roared quietly, fighting the urge to surrender to the eyes.

"Hijikata-sa~n," he whimpered.

"Fine, fine, I'll drink it!" I gave in, chugging it all at once. "Now, out of my face."

Pushing him arm's length away, I settled back and exhaled.

"I feel a little refreshed, but..."

I closed my eyes, and started feeling a bit odd. Furrowing my eyebrows, I decidedly opened my eyes, only to become insanely dizzy. Falling forward, I was caught by Sougo.

"You bastard. What did you put in that tea?" I interrogated huskily.

"Aphrodisiacs," Sougo smirked triumphantly.

"You little," I started, about to throttle him. Yet, when I moved my arms, he grabbed them, pinning me down.

Struggling, I kept cursing him. As impaired as I am at the moment, I was still winning. I was winning, until he fell back and jerked me on top of him. Then, he started playing dirty.

"Hijikata-san," he whispered beside my ear.

"Sh-shut up, you bastard," I kept struggling, though my attempts were getting weaker. He could definitely tell, too. His stupid smirk said so.

"Hijikata-san," he whispered again, pushing his knee against my crotch.

"N-! No," I squeaked, trying to push myself off him.

"No?" he repeated, holding me down against him.

Gripping my ass roughly, he groped me through the fabric.

"Ah, this feels weird! What is this?" grunting, I thought broken, incomprehensive thoughts, unable to concentrate.

"Stop- let go," I begged, my resistance almost without strength.

"Hijikata-san," he shifted his hands beneath my robe and returned them to their former position, only, he froze.

Feeling my blood run cold, I shivered at the dark chuckle thrumming from his chest.

"What's this?" he purred, pulling my robe up over my butt. "I never knew, Hijikata-san."

Nibbling my ear, he continued, "You really are a pervert."

Suppressing a moan, I tried to protest.

"N-no."

"I bet the loincloth-masked man actually stole some of your panties, thinking they were some pretty lady's," Sougo continued, stretching and tightening my underwear around me. Sougo chuckled. "Or maybe a sexy woman's. At least he might have gotten the sexy part right."

If I had had half a brain at the time, I probably would have bashed his brains in. I didn't, though. Both halves were focusing on all the things Sougo was doing to my body.

Slipping his hands beneath the underwear, Sougo asked, "Can you feel that?" spreading my ass and squeezing as he continued to manipulate my body. Defiantly, I replied with a no.

"Oh really?" he said, shifting about under me.

"What are you-?" confused, I started to inquire. "Ah?!" I moaned, feeling a hot, wet heat on my nipple.

"Hijikata-san," Sougo scolded me around it. "You gotta be quiet."

"Sh-shu-ah!"

I covered my mouth with my hands. In turn, I fell entirely upon Sougo, becoming almost completely dependent on him.

"Nhh!"

"Hijikata-san," he whispered against my neck, his fingers diving between my cheeks.

"Gh!" I stifled a moan, still refusing to give in.

"Hijikata-san," he chuckled. "Have you noticed yet?"

I looked at him curiously.

"Noticed wha- Ah!" crying out suddenly, I think I definitely noticed.

"You notice yet?" Sougo panted like a dog, penetrating deep into me.

"Ah...! Ngh! You-... bastard...!" I stuttered, unable to talk without screaming.

"Hijikata-san. You still haven't answered me," he breathed by my ear, kissing my neck.

"Bastard, I'll kill you," I grumbled against him.

He chuckled.

"Fall asleep in the tub and drown, Hijikata-san," he cursed.

"You've gotten soft," I spoke aloud.

"You think I've gotten soft?" he smirked, ramming me harder. "I think I've gotten harder, actually."

"Ngh!"

The tears welled up, attempting an escape that I wasn't about to allow.

"Hijikata-san," he called my name desperately.

"Nn! Shut up, Sougo!" I yelled at him.

"Hijikata-san!" he held on tighter, clinging to me desperately. "Hijikata-san!"

"N-no! Ah...!" I wept, feeling his cock harden to its limit.

Coming together, Sougo kissed me, our lips holding in our screams of ecstasy.

Shooting up in bed, I shouted, "Ecstasy?!"

Breathing again, I looked around my room.

"What the hell...?" I sighed.

Stretching in place, I relaxed again, dropping my arms to my sides, only, I'm pretty sure that's not my side. Looking to where my hand lay, I saw the devil.

"Toshi!" Kondo-san burst into my room. "Sougo's missing!"

Kondo-san made eye contact with me suddenly after shouting.

"Oh. Well, then," Kondo-san settled down. "Explain this to me."

Sitting down beside me, Kondo-san waited for my explanation. Glowering down at Sougo, I spoke.

"It's his fault," I decided.

"Uhuh..." he nodded. "What is?"

All the blood rushed to my face.

"Nothing..."

Covering my face, I hoped that Kondo-san would leave.

"Well, just get ready," Kondo-san spoke, standing up. "We gotta eat breakfast and then hit the town."

After he exited, I heard Sougo rustling beneath the sheets.

"Hijikata-san," I heard his low drawl. "Good morning."

Looking down at him, I almost smiled.

"Bastard," I smacked my fist against his head before getting up and heading to the bathroom.

"Hijikata-san," I heard him whine.

:

Thank you for reading! Please, criticize, praise, or just comment! But don't forget the extras. Thank you~!

:

"Bastard...!" I roared silently in the bathroom, feeling something pour out of me in the shower. "I'll kill him!"

:

About a week later, after that night, I had gone out to destroy anything I owned that Sougo might use to make fun of me, mainly the pan- I mean underwear- I had been wearing that night. Making sure I hadn't left anything behind, I realized something. Either Sougo was right and the loincloth-masked man _had_ taken some of my underwear, or Sougo had taken a pair for who knows what.

"...Sougo," I nodded to my self decidedly.

It's official: if he doesn't fuck me first, I'm gonna kill him.


End file.
